Hugo and the Spanish Mona Lisa

“Isn’t the Mona Lisa in Paris?” asked the assistant Hugo had brought with him on his trip to Madrid. His name was Mathieu. He was a good guy… but a tiny bit thick. “There are different versions of it”, answered Hugo, “the one at the Prado Museum was made by one of Leonardo’s assistants…” “Well, the one that used to be there anyway” he added, contemplating the empty space left on the wall where the painting used to be. “The teenage mutant ninja turtle?” asked Mathieu. Hugo preferred not to answer that and just gave Mathieu a look that he knew meant that he should rather stop talking. “They didn’t take anything else. Not “Las Meninas” or all the invaluable paintings from Bosch or Goya. Just this one.” And how they did it was the tricky question. As an internationally renowned detective (and sometimes spy), Hugo had seen a lot of crimes. This one however was a puzzle — they didn’t leave a trace! The alarm didn’t go off, and it was only noticed that the painting was gone when opening the museum at 10am that morning. That was exactly why they called Hugo specially from Milton Keynes. They could not possibly […]

Rat In Water

The Terror Night Of Ron The Bearded Rat

This is the story of a bearded rat named Ron. One day he was walking on a bridge called Caillo Sainto Leonardo. This bridge is a very famous and beautiful bridge placed in the center of Madrid, and which the football team Real Madrid go on every single day. Well anyway, he was walking on the bridge when the team captain Ronaldo ran on then off… Now the whole football team!   You think you are lucky to see the whole Real Madrid football team… Well, Ron wasn’t lucky, as this is what happened next. “Aaaaaaaaaaah!” he was falling into the river, and bearded rats can’t swim. Luckily, he had time to activate his invention rat boat by pressing 2 buttons on his backpack. Oh, yes and I forgot  to say Ron was an inventor. The only bearded rat inventor… And possibly the only rat inventor. Well anyway, now he had landed and was floating rather quickly so he turned around to see a waterfall. It was too late, he had fallen… Wait where was he. It looked like rat hell to him. But no it couldn’t be… It was the Devil Rats House.   He had to run and hide. […]

BB and the river

“A beard is a pain!”, thought BB, “but what can I do, we rats don’t have shavers.” His beard, all wet, was indeed dragging him down as he was pulling himself up the bank of the river. It all started when his friends — well, you could hardly call them that, could you — decided to dare him to swing himself from the bottom of the bridge, using his long, messy beard as a rope. Yes, of course, I hear you: He could just have refused. But, you know, when you are rat, you listen to what the dominant males say. It’s like that… It’s instinct. And when you are a rat with a beard, you could forget about even dreaming of being a dominant male. No really… a rat with a beard isn’t all that common. In fact, BB was the only one he, or any rat, cat, dog, hen, mouse, cow or sheep around those parts had ever heard of. This is why his friends (again, not really an accurate description) found it funny to call him BB — the Bearded Beast: A bearded rat with a name that sounds like “baby”. It was not likely that the […]

Snake

The Magical Adventure Of The Slithering Stupid Snake

  Once, a long time ago, a fully grown snake went out in the forest to find food for his babies. A couple of miles from the edge of the forest he found a wild boar. He crept up on it (well for us, slithered up to it) in the red and brown leaves. The boar turned his head round, as it had heard a crackling sound. Luckily, the snake hadn’t got spotted (well not luckily for the wild boar), so he kept on going. In a second you might not want to read as… …OK the snake bit the wild boar with his mighty poisonous teeth. “But, where am I?” would have thought the snake if he wasn’t stupid as instead he (actually) thought “Mm there might be more food here,” and before that “Where’s the wild boar?” Oh, and I forgot to tell you, he was falling in the portal that leaded to happy country which is a little… sorry, a giant country in grumpy planet. There were sort of flashing lights which the snake thought were the ssssign of nothingnessss (because of his stupidity), but were actually shooting stars (scientifically, falling meteors). Yes shooting stars!   “Phew!” […]

Sssssteve

Ssssshhh…. Winter has been tough! The biting cold was specially hard for cold blooded things like me. But spring has now come and brought with it yet a new bunch of offsprings. At least Hunting is not a vain task anymore. As I move through the woods, slowly — some would say sneakily, I wonder what this day will bring to my fangs. Warm blooded animals get foolish at this time of the year… Oh! Here it is! A wild boar! It might be quite a bit too big for me, but I can kill it now and bring the kids for a meal out later — my poison is always ready! I approach… not too quick so not to frighten it, but I’m not worried: These things are stupid! He could not even see me if I started dancing in front of him! I have no legs for dancing anyway. I get a bit closer by pretending to be still, but moving. Now I stop. I like to wait a bit, see the enormous beast in front of me live its last moment, unaware that fate will fall on him any second now. (fate is not my name, by […]

Zebra class

The Zebra Spots

Once upon a time, there was a zebra with black and white spots instead of black and white stripes. Unfortunately, he had had them since he was born. Yes, since he was born! So on his third birthday (in Zebra age), and his first day to school he got bullied quite a lot, because of his spots! Of course, he knew that no matter your appearence, you can always be friends. You obviously see that he told his parents (well he could  have told his teacher). And guess what his parents said? Well they said “tell your teacher she can help and we can’t.” Then he said “you just did.” The next day he went to school and told his teacher, but went back home as he was too sad. And that day his teacher told all the children what he had said, but unfortunately they said they wanted to hear it from his own mouth. So the next day the teacher told him what had happened and he did tell them. And they happily all became friends. By Hugo d’Aquin Image from John and Melanie (Illingworth) Kotsopoulos